Reasons to Seek Counseling in Palatine, IL

Counseling in Palatine, IL

The staff at Palatine, IL counseling office of Lotus Wellness Center knows that being in a relationship can be one of the most difficult but rewarding things in life. In a reciprocal, two-way, caring relationship, you might truly enjoy spending time with each other and have open communication if an issue comes up. This does not happen in all relationships, however. Even in healthy relationships, maintaining strong communication can be a challenge. Expressing oneself effectively, especially during emotional conflicts, does not always come easily. Often, thoughts and feelings go unsaid and it can be hard to voice what either of you would like in the relationship. When left unacknowledged, communication issues can quickly derail a relationship, causing each partner to feel as if they are not being heard or understood. Marital problems can quickly increase your stress level.

If you and your partner have been at odds, it may make sense to seek the help of a professional. The Lotus Wellness Center may be able to help you and your partner share your troubles and find common ground through Palatine, Illinois counseling. When you and your partner are struggling to communicate productively, a professional may be able to provide insight on strategies you can use. It is common for two people in a relationship to go through rough periods, getting the help that you need early on will give you a greater chance of being able to repair the issues coming up in your relationship.

Working at a relationship can take time and care, and when you seek IL counseling in Palatine you know you are getting the care you need at the Lotus Wellness Center. Our team of trained and skilled professionals want to provide you the services so you can improve your mental health and maintain stronger relationships. Everyone has challenges that they face in their life. Whatever obstacle you are confronted with, we will not judge you for your choices and experiences. We can help you and your significant other build a sturdy foundation for your relationship to last. If you would like to set up your appointment with us today, call our office now.

Problems Couples May Face

Couples seeking counseling should turn to the experienced and compassionate therapists at our clinic. Our therapists are skilled and certified in providing you and your partner with a range of therapeutic services. There are many misconceptions about therapy, so we are here to help you better understand its many benefits. There is no one-size-fits-all solution to therapy, and a treatment plan is structured differently according to the client’s needs. Schedule an appointment with us so we can sit down with you and learn more about your needs so we can go over the services that would be best for you. 

It’s not uncommon for couples to struggle with issues in their relationship. Bumps in a relationship are natural, as there is no perfect relationship. However, when issues are recurring or if they begin to affect the foundation of your relationship, As a result, couples can experience a number of consequences as a result of relationship problems:

  • Insecurity Within the Relationship
  • Feeling Disconnected from One Another
  • Reduced Levels of Affection
  • Issues with Trust
  • Divorce

If you and your partner are struggling in your relationship and unsure of how to find your way back to one another, couples counseling may be the right approach to help you repair your relationship. Meeting a therapist who is an unbiased third party can help you understand the issues each of you are facing and come up with productive methods to solve them. They will ask you tough questions so you can critically think about what kind of changes you want to see. Going to couples counseling does not mean that there is anything wrong with you or that you have failed each other. Every couple faces hardships and couples counseling is just one effective solution that may yield positive results for you. There can be a vast range of benefits for couples who choose Illinois counseling in Palatine, including:

Reason #1 – Face Infidelities

If one person in the relationship has been unfaithful, it can take a significant period of time for couples to heal from the damage that has likely occurred as a result. Cheating on a partner is one of the most common ways that a relationship is damaged. However, it is possible to repair a relationship after infidelity has occurred. Trust will not be restored in a few weeks, or even months. It will require commitment and patience. You will both be experiencing a wide range of emotions from: guilt, fear, anger, and jealousy. In couples counseling sessions these emotions will need to be addressed. During sessions, you can have a safe space to discuss the affair, the violation of trust and slowly begin rebuilding trust between one another.  

Reason #2 – To Discuss Finances

Money is a common thing that couples are frequently in disagreement over. One partner may have their preferred way of keeping track of finances, while their partner may have a vastly different approach. Sometimes spending habits can become a problem, which can lead to issues like gambling addictions or high credit card debt. Income disparities can also result in disagreements over finances. In some cases, finances may even be difficult for couples to discuss with one another. There may be feelings of insecurity and distrust that keep those conversations from occurring. Money is one of the biggest topics couples struggle with. Dealing with money issues early is critical for couples so it doesn’t grow into a larger problem. A couples therapist can help by breaking down financial issues. They can help couples voice their concerns, manage their expectations and seek the right solutions.

Reason #3 – Trouble Making Decisions

Are relationships often resulting in arguments? Are you finding that key decisions and issues are left unresolved. The longer a couple has been together, the more they may find this challenging. Once you have committed to your partner, you will soon have to make major decisions that will have a major impact on both you and your families’ lives. Having decisions that are not resolved can result in lingering questions and uncertainty about how you and your partner will move forward. Your future will seem like it’s up in the air. While this may not appear catastrophic at first, over time it may begin to weigh on you. Coming together on these key issues is essential, especially for those as significant as these:

  • Whether to Marry
  • Whether to Have Children
  • Managing Family Members

Reason #4 – Communication 

Talking about communication during Illinois counseling at Lotus Wellness Center is key for any healthy relationship. Unfortunately, poor communication is a primary reason many couples end their relationships. If you and your partner are not communicating, you are unable to:

  • Get the support you need
  • Make decisions 
  • Build connection 
  • Resolve disagreements

This can cause issues within the relationship to worsen. Working with a couples therapist is key to helping you and your partner learn healthy ways of communicating.

Reason #5 – You Have Chosen to End the Relationship

If you and your partner have made the difficult decision to part ways, you may consider talking to a couples counselor to help manage the division of your lives. Whether you choose to do this individually with a therapist or in partnership with your soon to be ex, the road ahead will require you both are able to make a number of significant decisions over the future, especially if you shared assets and had children together. 

Relationship Challenges Can Be Impactful

Struggling within your relationship can not only be stressful but lonely. If you and your partner are at odds, it’s almost certain that challenges within the relationship are impacting you as an individual as well. There are a plethora of reasons that may have brought you and your partner to where you are today. However, you can take action by working with a couples therapist. We can help by leveling the playing field so that both of you feel heard, deepen your intimacy and learn skills to more effectively managing the challenges that arise within your relationship.

Whether You and Your Significant Other Need Therapy

Taking the first step toward fixing your relationship can be incredibly difficult. Not only do you understand that something needs to be fixed between the two of you, but you might need professional help to do so. So, how do you know if it’s time to seek help from our office? It can be hard to make the choice to go to couples counseling. When you make that choice, it can feel like you are admitting that something is wrong in your partnership or that things aren’t going well. It can also be confusing if you do not know what to expect or how to get the process started. You both must decide to go, you have to figure out if insurance will cover it, you have to commit to a time that fits everyone’s schedules, and you want to like your counselor. All of these things together can seem daunting.

If you and your partner are unsure of whether couples counseling is right for you, below you will find a series of statements that can help point you in the right direction.

  • Trust has been broken. Many times, couples will attend therapy because there is a need to overcome some breach of trust. This breach of trust can come in many forms, including emotional affairs with another person, infidelity through a sexual affair, or even lies regarding family finances. Whatever the breach of trust was, it can be very hard to rebuild. However, counseling can help rebuild that foundation of trust so that both parties can begin establishing the base of trust to work on their relationship.
  • Communication is lacking. Perhaps you feel like there is a communication divide with your partner. It seems that you have no idea what is going on in their work life or what your partner is feeling lately. You might even believe that what you say or feel is often ignored or even misunderstood. Counseling offers a safe space for both parties to talk freely about their thoughts and feelings. It can be a place to help you reconnect and truly listen to one another.
  • You argue about the same thing. Over and over again. This one might not seem like a big deal. Every couple has fights. But the occasional fight can turn into nagging and begrudging. Have you told him that those mugs are hand wash only and can’t go in the dishwasher? Why is he loading them in there again? Perhaps you’ve told her that you are tired of her getting home from work late when the kids are already asleep and the food you prepared is cold. One of the greatest issues here is that the way you are communicating could be wrong for the person you are trying to communicate with. Does it seem like you have more conflicts in your life instead of joyous moments? These conflicts could take the form of smaller arguments or disagreements littered throughout the day, or huge fights that leave you seething or in tears. While arguing or disagreeing with your significant other is nothing out of the ordinary, and increase in these arguments or not being able to remember the last time you weren’t fighting is a sign you should visit a counselor.
  • You hold onto grudges. All relationships have problems. Words have been said that cannot be taken back. Perhaps you are projecting this relationship perfection you see on social media on your relationship and it isn’t living up to those standards. Whatever the grudge is, it is a result of being unable to talk through past differences and feelings to come out stronger on the other side. This can greatly sabotage a relationship.
  • You would rather do anything else than have sex. You might feel that the emotional intimacy (or the “spark”) is gone. Perhaps you are both having sexual issues. This could be seen as going from frequent and regular sex to irregular or no sex. Emotionally you might feel incompatible or like you are both growing apart. Palatine, IL counseling can help pinpoint the problems in these areas and discuss ways that they can be rebuilt. When your partner tries to make a move on you, you might come up with any excuse not to have sex. Or perhaps it’s the other way around and you don’t understand where the spark went. If there has been a large decline in your sexual relationship and physical affection, there’s usually more at the root of the problem than being tired or sick all the time.

The Do’s and Don’ts of Couples Counseling

The goal of a therapist or counselor is to provide the couple guidance, clarity and assistance as they work to understand each other and their relationship. Without the help of a counselor, many couples who are experiencing problems would not be able to reach a healthier place.

However, a counselor can’t do the work alone. A couple who comes to counseling in Palatine, IL, must be prepared to follow a few ground rules. Here are some do’s and don’ts that couples should keep in mind as they enter counseling.

Do Choose the Right Therapist or Counselor

Sometimes, a therapist is not the best fit for a couple. There may be personality differences, or the therapist’s counseling style might not work for the couple. One person may have a hard time relating, or the couple may feel their questions are not being answered.

Sometimes, couples need to find a different therapist. It doesn’t reflect poorly on anyone if a switch is the best solution. It’s vital for everyone to feel comfortable in the counseling sessions; otherwise, they will not be productive. It’s worth the effort to find counseling in Palatine, IL, that benefits everyone.

Do Make Therapy a Priority

Are you serious about your relationship? If so, you need to keep your appointments, even on the days you don’t want to bother, or you feel things are going well. Therapy is a continuous process, and the insights you gain during counseling in Palatine, IL, help you through good and bad times. Your relationship is worth the extra effort of keeping all of your appointments.

Don’t Try To Change Your Partner

You may go into counseling in Palatine, IL, with the idea of pointing out all the negative factors of your partner. However, the only person you can change is yourself. Remember that everyone has areas to improve — while your partner works on shortcomings, so can you.

Don’t Skip the Homework

If your counselor at the Lotus Wellness Center gives you instructions or methods to try at home, be sure to do your homework. It is your chance to put into action the things you learn during your sessions. Read any suggested materials and make time for difficult conversations. Real-world practice is the best way to apply your new skills. 

Your therapist at the Lotus Wellness Center is there to provide the tools you need to work on your problems and strengthen your relationship. Keep these tips in mind to get the most out of your sessions.

Key Questions to Ask a Prospective Therapist

When in the market for a good therapist, it is important to do your research. You will want to ensure that you find a professional who is experienced and credentialed. Once you have narrowed down your options, it will be important that you either speak with the therapist by phone or meet with them in person. You will want to make sure that the therapist feels like a good fit for both you and your partner. Here are some important questions to ask a prospective therapist when you speak with them:

  • What are their beliefs and values?
  • What is their experience?
  • What is their perspective on divorce and separation?
  • You will want to find out if they accept your insurance
  • What is their therapeutic approach?
  • What are your credentials?
  • What will happen at a typical therapy session?

Taking the time to ask a therapist questions about their beliefs and therapeutic practice will help when making a decision.

Signs You Should Call a Therapist

Relationship problems can impact all aspects of your life. You and your partner are supposed to support one another, love one another, and listen to one another. When this is missing, it can leave a person feeling lonely and lost. Here are some easy signs to identify when it may be time to seek counseling in Palatine, Illinois from a professional:

  • You and your partner are no longer communicating with each other.
  • When any type of communication involves some sort of argument, it may be a good idea to contact a therapist.
  • If you are constantly worried that communication will lead to an argument, or you are emotionally impacted in a negative way.
  • By cutting off communication with one another, you lack the ability to discuss any. problems in the relationship.
  • If you are considering an affair
  • If you are unable to see the way in which you are contributing negatively to the relationship.
  • Playing the blame game when everything is your partner’s fault.

There are a number of reasons to engage in couples counseling. Relationship issues are more common than most people realize. The sooner you and your partner take the plunge, the better chance you will have at repairing your relationship.

Coming to terms with the fact that you need to go to couples counseling can be a huge step in healing your relationship. Although it can seem scary at first, one of our dedicated counselors can walk you through issues you are having and determine what is causing them. It can be stressful and exhausting when you are not getting along with your partner. The impact can be widespread as it can have a serious impact on everyone living in your home, especially your children. We are dedicated to helping you and your partner build upon your strengths as a couple. Call the Lotus Wellness Center for IL counseling in Palatine today.